MCTWISTS OFF LAUNCH RAMPS PT. 2

Posted by Adam

OK, SO I STARTED WRITING THIS IN A PART ONE SEGMENT A WHILE BACK. I WAS ACTUALLY INSPIRED BY A COMMERCIAL WHICH IS HARD FOR EVEN ME TO BELIEVE, BUT TRUE. TO BRING YOU UP TO SPEED I SAW A COMMERCIAL THAT REMINDED ME OF THE FIRST DAY I REALIZED I WANTED TO SKATE AND THERE WAS NO TURNING BACK. THE DAY WENT LIKE THIS. TYPICAL MORNING AT THE KRAGER HOUSE. I'M SURE I AWOKE AND RAN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE WITH MY MOM YELLING "SLOW DOWN!" RELENTLESSLY AS I SCURRIED BY TO GET OUTSIDE AND PLAY. I WAS LIKE TEN YEARS OLD AND WHEN I WAS TEN YEARS OLD THAT'S WHAT KIDS DID, THEY WENT OUTSIDE AND FUCKING PLAYED ALL DAY UNTIL THEIR PARENTS WERE SCREAMING FOR THEM TO COME HOME, NOT LIKE THESE DAYS WHERE KIDS LEARN HOW TO CLIMB A TREE WITH THE FUCKING Wii SYSTEM.....SICKENING. I DIDNT OWN A SKATEBOARD AT THIS POINT BUT MY OLDER FRIENDS DOWN THE STREET DID AND I WOULD GO AND GAZE AT THEIR FEEBLE ATTEMPTS TO JUMP THINGS AND CREATE WHAT THEY CALLED "RAMPS" NEARLY EVERY TIME I HAD THE CHANCE. THIS DAY, THE ONE THAT STICKS OUT IN MY HEAD, I RODE MY BIKE DOWN THE STREET TO A OLDER FELLOW NAMED JAMIE PANTELLO'S HOUSE. AS I RODE UP THE DRIVEWAY I SAW WHAT I WOULD STILL DESCRIBE TODAY AS A QUARTER PIPE BUT JAMIE INSISTED IT WAS "A LAUNCH RAMP". I KNEW THAT AS SOON AS THE FINISHING TOUCHES WERE DONE ON THIS THING THAT CHAOS WOULD ENSUE............AND IT DID. JAMIE, IN EXCITEMENT, HAD A CROWD OF NEIGHBORHOOD KIDS GATHERED AND HAD US ALL HELP IN LIFTING THIS BEAST OUT ONTO THE SIDEWALK. WE PLACED THE RAMP PERFECTLY AND ALL WATCHED, WAITING FOR WHAT WAS NEXT, BECAUSE HONESTLY THEY NEVER GOT THIS FAR ON ANY OF THEIR OTHER SO-CALLED "LAUNCH RAMPS". NOW THAT I'M OLDER AND I LOOK BACK WITH AN UNDERSTANDING OF WHAT VERTICAL IS I REALIZE WHY WHAT HAPPENED NEXT WENT DOWN THE WAY IT DID. THERES A NOISE THAT THE SIDEWALK IN THE SUBURBS MAKES WHEN YOU HEAR A KID SKATING DOWN IT AND FROM THAT SOUND YOU CAN JUDGE HOW FAST THEY'RE GOING BY THE REPETITION OF CLICKS MADE BY THE WHEELS MEETING THE CRACKS. JAMIE WAS PUSHING FULL FORCE UP TO THIS RAMP AND IT JUST WASN'T ENOUGH. ONE OF THE OTHER OLDER KIDS, MIKE SUDDER, HAD A HONDA SPREE MUCH LIKE THE SCOOTERS COMMONLY USED TODAY TO PULL SKATERS WHEN THERE'S A SHORT RUN WAY. JAMIE AND MIKE PUT THEIR STONED HEADS TOGETHER AND DECIDED TO PULL JAMIE BEHIND THE SPREE MOTOR BIKE FOR SPEED, LETTING HIM CLEAR THE TOP OF A LAUNCH RAMP WITH I'D SAY AT LEAST A HALF FOOT OF VERT. THIS PART OF THE STORY IS AS CLEAR AS YESTERDAY......ACTUALLY, I WAS STONED YESTERDAY SO LET ME JUST SAY ITS A VERY FOND MEMORY. MIKE STARTED MUCH FURTHER BACK THAN HE NEEDED TO AND KEPT PUMPING JAMIE UP SAYING "C'MON YOU PUSSY....JUMP THE FUCKING THING!" WITH JAMIE RESPONDING "YOU FUCKING DO IT" AS JAMIE GRABBED ONTO THE SPREE. NOW THE CLICKS I MENTIONED EARLIER THAT THE SIDEWALK MAKES BEGAN TO BLEND INTO JUST A VIBRATING NOISE MUCH LIKE THE OLD CARD IN THE SPOKES TRICK YOU DID TO YOUR BIKE AS A CHILD. THEY WERE HAULING ASS WAY TOO FAST DIRECTLY AT THE RAMP AND WERE NOT GIVING UP. I WILL NEVER FORGET WATCHING MY MENTOR SCREAM THE WORDS "MCTWIST!!" AS HE HIT THE RAMP AND FLEW INTO THE AIR DOING WHAT LOOKED LIKE A SERIOUS MCTWIST ATTEMPT OFF OF THE MOST POORLY CONSTRUCTED LAUNCHING DEVICE I'D EVER SEEN. MID-AIR AND UPSIDE DOWN IT SEEMED THAT EVERYTHING WAS IN SLOW MOTION AS HE FLIPPED INTO A SITTING POSITION AND HIS LEG LANDED AGAINST THE BOARD IN PERFECT LEG BREAKING PRIMO FASHION FOLLOWED BY A LOUD SNAP LIKE I'D NEVER HEARD BEFORE. JAMIE WAS SITTING UP ON HIS ASS WITH HIS LEG SNAPPED IN HALF BETWEEN THE FOOT AND KNEE CAP OVER HIS SANTA CRUZ ROB ROSKOPP BOARD CRYING AND SCREAMING FOR HIS MOM. SECONDS LATER HIS MOM BOLTS OUT OF THE HOUSE AND HAD JAMIE SCOOPED OFF THE PAVEMENT AND HOSPITAL BOUND IN A MATTER OF SECONDS. GOTTA LOVE MOMS. I REMEMBER A FEW MINUTES OF PURE SILENCE AFTER ALL THIS HAPPENED WHERE EVERYONE WAS KINDA LOOKING AT EACH OTHER IN SURPRISE....OUR NEIGHBORHOOD HAD NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THIS BEFORE. THEY WERE ALL STUNNED RUSHING THEIR KIDS HOME IN FEAR OF JAMIE'S RECKLESS INFLUENCE. ME ON THE OTHER HAND....... I SAW WHAT WAS GOING TO TAKE UP THE NEXT 23 YEARS OF MY LIFE. SKATEBOARDING. AND HERE I AM, LOOKING BACK AT THE DAY THAT EVERYTHING CHANGED, JUST LIKE THE COMMERCIAL SAID. HOW THIS INFLUENCED ME TO SKATE I HAVE NO IDEA BUT I KNEW FROM THAT POINT ON THE WORD "MCTWIST" WOULD BECOME A PART OF MY EVERY DAY LINGO.